By Oleander Plume
How about a few more visual aids before we begin? In my mind, Eros looks a bit like this:
And Archimedes? How about this guy?
Are you fired up and ready? Let’s go!
John grabbed Wilson by his tie, and pulled him in for a hot kiss.
“I’ve wanted you for so long,” John said.
“John, I’ve wanted you, too.”
Wilson returned John’s kiss and deepened it. Their tongues met and the heat between them grew. Clothes flew in all directions as they stripped each other down to skin. Wilson dropped to his knees.
“Such a beautiful cock”, he said, taking it in his fist and rubbing the head over his aching lips. “Delicious.”
John tangled his fingers in Wilson’s hair. “Your mouth is so hot, baby.”
Wilson wrapped his lips around the flared head, then slid down, taking John’s full length inside his hungry mouth—
My hand froze mid-stroke when a bulky form cast a shadow over my personal space. I knew it was Archimedes even before he made a sound because his delectable, I mean, annoying scent always enters the room before he does.
“What are you doing, Eros?”
“Oh, hey Arc, just checking up on my handiwork.”
Busted. I pulled down the hem of my toga and tried to cover my gigantic boner, but Arc knew what I was doing. Not that I cared. He frowned at me and turned off the monitor.
“Focus, Eros. We leave in an hour.”
“Back the truck up, Arc, did you say ‘we’? I fly solo, remember?”
“The Boss wants me to shadow you, since we are still undoing the damage from last year.”
I smiled sweetly and batted my lashes. “What damage?”
Arc crossed his arms over his chest and glared at me. “Where should I start? How about the prime minister of Spain? You made him fall in love with a bull and the entire country almost went down the tubes!”
“Yeah, that was awesome.”
“No, it was not ‘awesome’. This madness has to stop, Eros.” Arc stood up on his toes a little, like he always does when he’s really pissed off. I like making him get up on his tiptoes.
“Big deal. One episode. Yawn.”
“Did you actually forget that incident with the American president and his intern?”
“Hey, that was not my fault! If that little cutie would have remembered to take her dress to a decent dry cleaner that shit storm would have never happened.” Arc gave himself a face palm and sort of growled at me. “All right. I promise to tone things down a little.”
“You could get demoted. Is that what you want?”
“Maybe? You would rather assist the Sandman? Making people fall in love is an important task, and you are belittling it with your apathy. Your arrows hold the power to bring down empires, Eros. I should think you would tackle your endeavors with more forethought.”
“Have you taken a long look at humans? Some of those assholes deserved to be fucked with, Archimedes. They don’t treasure love. Money—that’s their only motivator. Greedy little bastards, the lot of them.”
“Judging them is not our task, remember?” Arc slung his quiver over his back. “Neither is watching them make love.”
“They don’t make love. They fuck, and it’s the only thing they do that interests me.”
“You know, for the God of Love, you are surprisingly unromantic.” Arc shook his head.
“Romance is overrated.” I folded my arms behind my head and leaned back in my chair. “So, I’m stuck with you for the next twenty-four hours?”
“Yes. I have some preparations to make, but I’ll be back in an hour. Try to remember that today is Valentine’s Day, not April Fools.” He snapped his fingers and disappeared.
Valentine’s Day is a fucking joke. Can I tell you why? For starters, it’s my busiest day of the year, twenty-four hours of pure hell. Last year, I got a blister on my finger the size of Montana, but nobody gave a shit.
Just keep shootin’ those arrows, Eros.
Yeah, I’m that guy. Otherwise known as Cupid. Only, don’t call me that, I hate the ‘C’ word. When you picture that word, you think of a curly haired toddler, clad in a diaper, flitting around on tiny gossamer wings, right? Well, let me tell you something, pal, I ain’t no toddler. I’m a fucking god, for shit’s sake.
Do me a favor, the next time you hear that “C” word, picture a burly dude, about seven-foot-two, with golden curls down to his nipples and a face carved by angels. By the way, I can get away with saying that because I was carved by angels—literally, I really do wear a short toga that has a sash tied around the waist, and I do have wings, but they’re man-sized wings, white as snow and soft as a duckling’s ass.
I also carry a bow, and a never-ending supply of arrows that I keep in a quiver on my back. Those arrows can cause a lot of pain, I mean, what hurts as much as love? Especially unrequited love. Sigh.
Oh, right, back to the story. Like I was saying, Valentine’s Day is my craziest day, but I work all year—24/7, 365–making people fall in love. Pffffffbt. I’m sick of this job.
Geez, Eros, that’s a pissy attitude for the God of Love, huh?
If you said that, you’d be right, but I wasn’t always this way. In the beginning, oh, about a thousand years ago, maybe more, I loved making people fall head over heels for each other. Over the millennium, that shit got stale, and I started fucking with people just for fun. You’ve seen my handiwork, trust me. I mean, how many times have you looked at an unlikely couple and thought to yourself
How in six holy fucking hells did those two get together?
Well, that was me—I did that. For example, there’s this English prince. He was engaged to a real cutie pie, but he was such an asshole. Right before his wedding I made him fall hard for a horse-faced gal. Good times, good times.
Of course, the Boss wasn’t happy and sent me an ‘assistant’ named Archimedes. He’s all right, I guess, if you like perfectly ripped guys with bronze skin and hair that cascades like ebony waves across broad shoulders, and eyes that reflect the perfect blueness of the sky, and ruby lips that—sorry, lost my head for a second. Arc and I never saw eye to eye on anything, and the idea of spending my crappiest day of the year with him made me want to gouge out my cerebellum with one of my own arrows.
Since I had an hour to kill, I turned the monitor back on. John and Wilson were still going at it. I pulled out my dick and resumed jerking off. Wilson was bent over his desk with John’s cock buried deep inside his cute little round ass. Wilson was moaning so loudly that I had to hit the mute button or risk being caught again. John rubbed his hands up and down Wilson’s back, stopping to kiss the back of his neck between thrusts, which I enjoyed seeing, since I like my smut with a little sugar on top. Damn that shit gets me hot. This is the only good part of my job—watching you people get busy. It’s like having free porn all the time.
I timed my orgasm right, and came just as Wilson did, but without all the noise. Then I cleaned up, restocked my quiver, and preened my wings while I waited for Arc. When he came back, I noticed that his toga was hiked up too much in the front and the tip of his dick was peeking out. I “accidentally” dropped my comb, just to get a better look. When I stood up again, he was staring daggers at me with his eyes.
“You might want to adjust that a little.” I nodded towards his crotch. “Then we can take off.”
He yanked down the hem to cover himself. “Yes. Let’s go up to the loft and pick our destination.”
The loft is a glass room that looks down over all of creation. It’s how we keep track of you people. Try not to think about that next time you’re in the shower or masturbating in a gas station bathroom. (Yeah, I saw that, Mark in Pittsburgh.)
“There. Sports bar in Chicago.” Archimedes pointed to a spot beyond the glass.
“Why there of all places? There’s a Valentine’s Day ball in Paris—”
“Don’t you see the glow of heartache down there? I do.”
I did see it. Heartache gives off an eerie, green glow, like poison swamp gas. Arc cloaked himself as a regular human and waited for me to do the same. I made myself an attractive twenty-something football fan. Arc conjured up a Cubs hat and stuffed it on my head.
I said, “I want to look like a regular dude, not a pathetic loser.”
“If the shoe fits.”
“You’re a real bitch sometimes, Arc. A real little bitch.”
Arc made a kissy face at me and snapped his fingers. We materialized in some place called Hooters and were immediately assaulted with the overpowering stench of deep-fried poultry. The place was teeming with humans and flat screened televisions. All the waitresses had big boobs and tiny T-shirts, which is fine if you like that sort of thing. Me, I’m gay. Give me a well-hung stud with big pecs and I’m all-good.
“Let’s take that table in the middle,” Arc said. “We’ll have a good view of the crowd.”
As we sat at a table in the bar area, a stacked blonde with sad eyes meandered over.
“Welcome to Hooters. What can I get for you?”
She smiled weakly, and I could almost smell her broken heart. Another reason I hate this job. Cute broad, asshole boyfriend—she had a bruise on her wrist, caused by his hands. I can read them like a book. Most of the time, it’s a horror novel.
“Hello, Luanne. Did anyone ever tell you that you have beautiful eyes?” I said.
“In this dump, no, I don’t think my eyes ever get noticed.”
“Well, you do. I’ll take a Corona, hold the lime.” Who puts fruit in beer? Eww.
Arc said, “I’ll have a white wine spritzer.” I shot him the look of death. “What?” he said.
“He’ll have a beer.” I said to Luanne. “But put a lime in his.”
“Coming right up.”
Arc pouted at me. “I don’t like beer.”
“You’re supposed to be fitting in, remember?”
“Right.” Arc said “Now, help me scope out the room.”
I glanced around the place and noticed quite a few lonely hearts. How can I tell? The area over the heart glows green when it’s sad or longing, red when fulfilled. Human eyes can’t see it.
“That one over there. Bears jersey, bad haircut,” I said. “Name’s Bill. Let’s set him up with the redhead in the corner, Joe.”
Arc gave me the stink eye. “Neither of them are gay, Eros.”
“So? They’d be hot together,” I said, “and I need some cuties to watch later.”
“You need to stop pairing people up solely for your own amusement,” Arc said.
“Well, who do you suggest then, smarty pants?”
Arc studied a table full of women. They were drinking $5 cosmos and giggling. One in particular stood out to me. She had dark brown hair and a pretty smile, but I waited to see what my “assistant” had to say.
“The young lady with the dark blonde hair and the green blouse would be a good match for Bill,” Arc said.
“Why?” I asked.
“She likes to read mystery novels and she adores cats.”
I laughed so loud I hurt myself. “You want to fix her up with the guy in the Bears jersey, the one with his eyes glued to the basketball game? Really?”
“Her name is Gwen, by the way. Read her a little deeper.” Arc said. “She grew up with four brothers and has her own fantasy football team. Bill over there obviously loves sports, but he also likes quiet evenings at home, reading in front of the fire, and he’s always wanted a cat.”
Damn, it pissed me off when he was right. “Well, I suppose you could try it.”
Arc froze time and shot two golden arrows, one at Bill, one at Gwen. After he started the clock, we sat back and watched.
First, their eyes met. She shyly looked away, and he wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans. A few more furtive glances and Bill finally got his lazy butt off the bar stool and headed in her direction. Judging by the smile on her face, Gwen liked what she saw.
“Look Eros, both their heart meters are in the red zone,” Arc said.
“Yeah, aren’t they adorable?” I rolled my eyes.
Luanne headed back with our drinks. “One Corona with lime.” She set that one in front of Arc. “One without.” She smiled at me. “Anything else?”
“Not at the moment.” I handed her a hundred dollar bill. “Keep the change.”
“Thanks, but I shouldn’t.”
“You shouldn’t have to put up with losers looking down your shirt all night, but you do it because you need this job, right?” I asked. “Putting yourself through college isn’t easy.”
“You’re right. Thank you. I appreciate it—the compliment, too.”
“Hang in there, Luanne,” I said. “It gets better.”
When she headed back to the bar, a big jock patted her ass. She shot him a look, but kept walking. He laughed loudly as he grabbed his junk.
“What an asshole,” I muttered.
“Let’s stay focused on the task at hand,” Arc said.
“Guys like that piss me off, Arc. Let me put the whammy on him. I’ll make him fall in love with his bar stool. It’ll be hilarious.” I reached for an arrow, but Arc grabbed my arm.
“No, Eros,” Arc said.
“He was disrespectful to our waitress.” I said. “He deserves to be fucked with.”
“Instead of causing a conflict we don’t need, why not find a nice man for her?” Arc asked. “Fight boorishness with love.”
“Are you going to be this annoying all night?”
I drained half my beer and scoped the room. There wasn’t anyone suited for Luanne, but the night was young. Arc poked at the lime wedge that was stuck in the top of his bottle.
“What do I do with it?” he asked.
“Here. You squeeze it in the top, then hold your thumb over the opening and give it a swirl to mix it up. Not too hard or it’ll fizz all over.” I warned. “There. Now take a sip.”
I handed it back to him. He wrapped his red lips around the top and tipped it back. I fantasized for a moment that the bottle was my cock and felt my balls tingle.
Arc wrinkled up his nose as he swallowed.
“That is the vilest drink I have ever tasted.”
“If you suck my dick, you’ll get the taste out of your mouth,” I said, walking my fingers up his thigh, almost made it to the juicy center, too, but he smacked my hand away. “What?” I said.
Arc looked at me sternly. “We are on duty,” he said. “Concentrate.”
The fact that he didn’t shoot me down completely made me happy. Too bad I didn’t know when to keep my big trap shut.
“So.” I said, “you’re saying that maybe after work, you might drop to your knees and—”
His icy glare made my sphincter shut tight.
We drank our beer in awkward silence. I was ready to give up and move to another location, then two hot guys walked in. I pointed to the taller one and elbowed Arc in the ribs.
“Potential candidate for Luanne,” I said.
Arc nodded. “He’s a firefighter, just like Luanne’s father. You’re right Eros. They might be a good match. But don’t rush. Dig deeper.”
I concentrated and discovered the two guys were brothers. Tyler was a rescue worker, and Gavin was studying to be a nurse. The more I dug into Tyler’s history, the more I liked him. He was a catch and a half. I pulled an arrow out of my quiver. Arc held up one finger.
“He’s perfect,” I said. “What is your problem?”
“There’s another woman looking at him,” Arc said. “Maybe she’s a better fit.”
“No way,” I said, “Luanne’s getting the hunk. She needs this.”
I hit them both before Arc could protest anymore, then leaned back and grinned.
“Nice work, big E, nice work.” I loved complimenting myself. “Look, they’re smiling at each other.”
“Impressive.” Arc clinked his bottle against mine. “I feel like I saw a glimpse of the real you for a minute. Why do you suppose you felt so strongly about helping Luanne?”
“She needed a break.”
Arc gave me that crooked smile of his, the one he uses before he’s going to say something deep and annoying. “Perhaps you can relate to her pain since your own broken heart still bleeds. Maybe you should talk about it, slay that particular demon.”
“That has nothing to do with anything.”
I resisted the urge to knock Arc’s teeth down his throat. I don’t talk about my personal shit, ever, especially to him. I conjured up a shot of tequila and knocked it back, then another. Not that I can get drunk on human liquor. It was more for effect.
“We have one more, and then we can move on,” Arc said, pointing to Gavin. “He is wrapped in melancholy.”
I studied Gavin. He was smaller in stature than his hunky brother Tyler, with longish auburn hair and a soft heart. He was also gay. I perused the bar, but didn’t see a viable love interest for him. Then, I noticed Luanne and Tyler with big smiles on their faces, exchanging phone numbers. For some reason, their happiness only filled me with angst.
Arc pointed to the boorish jock who had manhandled Luanne earlier. “This one here has so much emotional pain, he’s like an open wound.”
“Who cares,” I said. “He’s an asshole. I hope he dies of a broken heart.”
“This is your whole problem, Eros. You have forgotten what love is really about.”
“No, Archimedes,” I said. “Unfortunately, I remember all too well.”
I stomped off with no particular direction in mind. I just wanted to get away from him. Somehow, I ended up in the men’s room, extremely disappointed that there was no glory hole. Gavin walked in, and I cloaked myself invisible so that I could get a look at his dick while he used the urinal. Don’t judge me. I need a cheap thrill as much as anyone. He was about to unzip when the jock walked in.
“Gavin Meyer—I remember you from high school. You’re still a twerp, huh?”
“Hi, Hank. I thought I recognized you.”
Hank took the urinal next to Gavin and pulled out a decent sized cock. Gavin did the same, but his was much larger, which I found amusing. Hank noticed it, too, and couldn’t seem to keep his eyes away. Then he grew anxious.
“Hey, faggot, stop looking at my dick!”
“What are you talking about?” Gavin said. “I was reading that poem written on the wall up there.” He turned pale.
Hank spat, “I saw you looking at my dick, queer.”
I could feel Hank’s rage and Gavin’s anxiety.
“Please, Hank, don’t start anything with me.” Gavin zipped and washed his hands.
Hank finished pissing, shook it way too many times and wiped his hands on his pants.
“Next time, keep your faggoty eyes to yourself.”
Hank gave Gavin a shove, knocking him to the floor, and that’s when I stopped time.
“Hank, you little bastard,” I sneered. “Taste my wrath, mother fucker.”
I pulled out an arrow and licked the tip. Then, I carved a name into the shaft: Gavin. I pulled back, aimed, and was just about to shoot that bastard into Hank’s muscled ass when I felt a strong hand on my shooting arm.
It was Arc “What are you doing?” he asked.
“Making the homophobic, misanthropic jock fall in love with the hot gay dude.”
“You licked the arrow,” he said. “That causes pain.”
“I know, Einstein,” I said. “I invented these, remember? Hank deserves to feel the sting as well as the pain of unrequited love, which is why I carved Gavin’s name into his arrow. Now, if you would please let go of me—”
Arc said, “If you read him deep enough, you would know he has already had his share of pain.”
I lowered my bow and groaned. “Cut the crap, Arc. It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t have the right to act the way he does just because he had a crappy childhood.”
“Read him,” Arc said.
I sighed. “Fine.”
I stood closer to Hank’s frozen body and dove into his brain. His thoughts were filled with images of himself back in high school, bullying Gavin in the locker room. The memories brought him no joy, only the sharp sting of regret. I went even deeper, to see what else I could uncover.
Stop crying, boy. What are you, a faggot?
No, Daddy, please. Don’t hit me anymore.
Hank at age ten, bloody lip caused by his drunken father, all because he spilled his juice.
I realized Arc was right. I wasn’t teaching a homophobe a lesson. Hank was gay and in the closet, terrified of being exposed. Causing him to ache for Gavin would only torment him further. I took the arrow out of the bow and broke it in half, watching it disappear in a puff of smoke.
“What do you suggest?”
“Sometimes, a little prodding is necessary.” Arc started whispering in Hank’s ear. “Your father is gone now, and the time has come to accept who you are and what you feel. Tell Gavin what is in your heart. Show him who you really are.” Arc snapped his fingers and we stood back to watch the scene unfold.
“Gavin, I’m sorry.” Hank helped Gavin off the floor. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.” Gavin smoothed his shirt. “Just like old times, huh? Guess you still hate me.”
“No, I don’t, actually,” Hank said. “I never hated you.”
Gavin asked, “Then why did you bully me all the time?” Tears welled up in Gavin’s eyes, which made my heart hurt. I rubbed my sternum and winced.
“You made me feel things I wasn’t ready for, I guess.” Hank started to cry, too, which irritated me. I stopped time again and grabbed two arrows.
Arc said, “What are you doing?”
“Enough already.” I said. “Let’s hit these two and get out of here.”
Arc dabbed at his eyes with a paper towel. “But this is so sweet. Don’t you want to see what happens next? It’s a beautiful moment.”
I didn’t answer him. My arrows went back in my quiver, and then I turned around and walked away. Fuck Archimedes and his romantic bullshit. Who needed it? Not me. Love sucks, people. It breaks you down and leaves you empty. I decided then and there that I was turning in my bow and quitting the business. Assisting the Sandman sounded much more palatable.
When the crowd came back to life, I knew Arc started the clock. He found me waiting outside.
“Did you shoot them?” I asked.
“No. I think we should wait,” he said. “They might fall in love all on their own. We can catch up on them later. Let’s go back to the loft and pick our next destination.”
Back at the loft, I rested my head against the glass and stared out at humanity. I felt the urge to puke. Arc looked like he was studying for a final exam, all serious and focused.
“What about there?” He pointed to New York.
“That hell hole?” I said. “Anywhere but there.”
“Look at that sea of green,” Arc said, gesturing toward the earth. “So much pain, so much loneliness, It’s almost impossible to choose.”
“Fuck ’em all,” I said. “Let’s go get drunk.”
“We have twenty-one hours left, and then you can have as much alcohol as you want.” Arc looked down at Chicago and grinned. “Look at Gavin and Hank.”
I peered down. They were sitting in Hank’s car, kissing. With soft lips and sighs, and gentle fingers stroking hair. The windows began to fog.
I said, “I wish there was a fast-forward button on this thing so we could just get to the part where they fuck.”
“You don’t have one shred of romance left inside, do you?” Arc asked.
“Nope. And that’s how I like it.”
Arc groaned, grabbed my arm, and snapped his fingers. We ended up in a small room that contained nothing but a black leather sofa. He pointed to it.
“Sit,” he said.
“Why?” I asked “Am I finally getting that blow job?”
“We’re going to talk.”
“I don’t want to talk, Archimedes. Let’s just finish our work. We don’t have time for this.”
“On the contrary,” he said. “We have all the time in the world.”
I sank back on the couch, knowing it was pointless to argue. Arc had brought us into a time free room. We could stay in there for weeks and only a second would pass in your world. A nice invention by some dude named Santa Claus. This way, he could stop to take a dump and not screw up his chimney-banging schedule. Brilliant, if you ask me.
Arc asked, “Eros, when did you lose your passion for your work?”
“I don’t know, Arc, when did you become my assistant?”
“Last February,” he said. “On the 15th to be exact.”
“That’s when,” I said, conjuring up a beer and popping the cap off with my teeth.
“You were just as surly then as you are today,” he said. “The question is, why? I think I know, but you need to say it out loud.”
“All I need is to get drunk and fucked. Whip it out and bend me over.”
“This is all about Tobias, isn’t it?”
I threw the beer bottle against the wall, shouting, “Don’t bring up his name!” My heart throbbed in my chest like a rotten tooth. I wanted to dig it out of my chest with a rusty spoon and feed it to Arc. Despite my attempts not to, I started to cry. “It’s not your business.”
Arc asked, “Do you know why I became your assistant?”
“Because the Boss doesn’t trust me.” I sniffled.
“We’ve known each other for a long time, but we’ve never been friends. Still, I wanted to help you. Your pain is so strong, it’s palatable. We all feel it, Eros. The truth is, I asked to be your partner.”
My jaw dropped in shock. “Why?”
“To help you find yourself again,” he said. “The world needs love now more than ever.”
“You all want me to get better so I can save those ungrateful bastards back on earth?” I asked. “Fuck you, Archimedes. Fuck you all. I’m quitting. You can take over.” I buried my face in my hands.
“That’s not the only reason. We care about you.” He put his hand on my shoulder. “I care about you.”
“If you really cared, you would leave me alone,” I said. “Or blow me. Take your pick.”
“Tell me about him, Eros,” Arc said. “The whole story.”
The words tumbled out before I could stop them. Maybe deep down I wanted someone to know.
“We were together for so long that I can hardly remember life without him. Then, somehow, he started slipping away from me. Tobias was my assistant and my lover. But things went bad, and then he fell in love with a human. He begged the Boss to take his immortality so that he could be with his human lover. She actually did what he asked. She took Tobias away from me.”
At that, I started sobbing. I had to take deep breaths before I could speak clearly enough to finish the story.
“I would stand up here and see them down there, loving each other, fucking each other. While I was alone. Then, to make it even more painful, I had to watch him grow old and wither away. I watched the love of my life die, and there was nothing I could do about it. That’s when I gave up, Arc. All love does is ruin you.”
I removed my quiver and dropped it to the floor, then handed him my bow.
“Why are you giving me this?” he asked.
“I told you,” I said. “I’m quitting.”
“I see,” Arc said pensively. “Obviously, more desperate measures are required.”
Arc snapped his fingers and the room changed. A large, four-poster bed appeared, and the white satin sheets were covered with rose petals. Classical music was playing on low volume, and dozens of candles lighted the space.
“What do you think?” he asked.
I said, “I think you’re starting to like me a little.”
“On the contrary, Eros, I don’t like you at all.”
He waved his hand and in a blink, I was on my back, naked, wrists bound to the headboard with red silk scarves.
“Oh, I get it,” I said. “You’re going to beat me into submission. Didn’t know you were into torture and all that crap. I thought you were an angel, not a demon.” I struggled against my bindings without success. “What are you going to do first, you sick fuck, peel off my skin, or pull out my fingernails with pliers?”
Arc smiled and dropped his toga. Two words. Duh. Amn. Drool pooled up in my mouth and I forgot my name. From the top of his head to the tips of his toes, he was glorious perfection. His cock was long and thick, with a glossy crown and a tight sac that was shaved clean. All topped with a well-trimmed patch of pubic hair. If my hands had been free, I would have buried my fingers in that silky thatch while I licked every crevice of his monster dick.
“I didn’t tie you up to hurt you, Eros,” he said.
“You didn’t?” I asked.
Arc slowly slithered across the bed, sexier than the snake from the Garden of Eden. He produced another silk scarf and wrapped it around my eyes.
I asked, “What are you going to do?”
“Nice things,” he said “Things you will like. This way, you have no choice but to give in. Relax and breathe, Eros. Let me give you a refresher course on romance.”
“But, wait a sec—” He shut me up by putting something sweet in my mouth. “Cherries?” I mumbled, my mouth full.
“Yes. They’re your favorite, aren’t they?”
“Yeah,” I said, finally swallowing. “I love them.”
“I have something else.” He lifted my head and held a glass to my lips. The indescribable sweet taste ensnared my senses.
“Mead? How did you get it?” Mead is the most delicious beverage in the world. It’s made by fairies, but those little bastards don’t like to share. “I haven’t had any in years.”
“Just drink,” Arc said.
The nectar went to my head, making me giddy and drunk as fuck. Mead also has another pleasing side effect: one sip and your genitals become hypersensitive. I giggled and gyrated my hips.
“Untie me, Arc, then spoon fuck me until I see stars,” I said.
“Patience is a virtue, lover.”
I heard the sheets rustle and a bottle being uncorked. The scent of lavender filled the air. Arc lifted my foot and rested it on what felt like his leg. Something warm and wet trickled over my skin before Arc’s warm fingers began massaging my foot.
“Holy crap, that feels good,” I said. “Now do my dick.”
“I have a ball gag,” he said. “Don’t make me use it.”
I snickered. “I didn’t know you were this kinky. Are you going to spank—”
Arc snapped his fingers. Another scarf materialized and wrapped itself around my mouth. I tried to protest, but my mouth was sealed shut.
“Please,” Arc said, “just relax.”
His fingers were magical as they moved slowly up my body, rubbing oil into every inch. First my toes, then each foot, followed by my legs. I giggled when he got close to my dick, but he bypassed it, moving on to my hips and abdomen.
Arc said, “Your body is exquisite, Eros. I have longed to get my hands on it.” He started to massage my pecs. “Most people forget to rub here, but not me. Do you like this?”
He rolled each nipple firmly between his thumb and index finger. I arched my back and almost bit through the gag while trying to tell him how much I liked it. I love getting my titties worked over. In fact, if you tweaked my nipples long enough, I could have an orgasm.
“Judging by how hard they are,” Arc said, “I would say the answer is yes.”
He pinched harder, causing me to pull against the restraints, the silk bindings dug into my skin, but it only added to my ardor. I could hear myself mewling like a kitten, and my cock turned into granite.
“I should stop that for a while. I see how excited you’re getting.”
I could sense his body hovering inches above my face as he leaned over me to massage my arms. I could smell his scent, a blend of fresh rain and male heat that mingled with the smell of lavender and made me dizzy. I tried to poke my tongue through the gag, eager to taste his sultry flesh.
“Hungry?” he asked.
I nodded. He removed the gag and fed me all sorts of delectable treats: cherries, chunks of ripe peaches, chocolate truffles and spun sugar. I was completely relaxed and buzzing all over, especially my head.
“I thought you didn’t like me,” I said.
“I don’t,” Arc said. “I love you.”
I felt his lips touch mine, and my heart threatened to escape from my body. “Oh, baby,” I said, “I didn’t know—”
He shut me up with another kiss. I gave in completely. The room around us disappeared, and the only thing I knew was Arc’s mouth. His tongue traced my bottom lip, then pushed inside to touch mine. He tasted like nectar from heaven.
“I want to see you.” I said, and he removed the blindfold. “Untie me, I won’t stop you, I promise.”
“And you won’t rush me?” Arc asked.
“You win, Arc,” I said. “I’ll do whatever you want. Just don’t stop. Please don’t stop.”
Once my hands were free, I pulled his body on top of mine, and tangled my fingers into his silky hair. With every kiss, it felt like he was opening me up and clawing through the dirt to yank out all the despair I had buried inside. I let him take me higher and higher while I wrapped my arms around him and reveled in the feel of his downy wings under my fingers.
“I want to taste you, Eros. Everywhere.”
His lips traveled down to my chest, leaving a trail of cleansed skin behind. He sucked one nipple into his mouth, and grazed it with his teeth.
“Yeah, baby, suck my titties,” I said. “Hell yeah.”
He looked up at me with his vibrant blue eyes while he licked. A noise that I can’t explain gurgled from my throat. It was almost a growl, but similar to a whimper. The kind of sound only a man who hasn’t had sex in two hundred years can make. The sound you would make if you were able to gaze upon the masterpiece of flesh that was Archimedes.
“You are so beautiful, Eros,” Arc said. “I’m going to make love to every inch of you. Will you let me?”
I made the noise again as I watched him play with my nipples until they were red and puffy. “Arc, you have the prettiest lips I’ve ever seen.” I said. “They’re so pouty and luscious.” He kissed his way down, pausing to lick my belly button. I tried to wriggle away. “Stop that!”
“I thought you might be ticklish,” he said and began to stroke my balls. “How about here?”
“Yeah, that tickles good.” I spread my legs. “Sorry, that wasn’t romantic. I’m failing the lesson.”
“You need to study a little harder,” Arc said, “that’s all.” He took my cock into his fist and circled the head with his tongue. “Look how much you’re dripping for me, lover. You taste even better than mead.”
His tongue teased up and down the slit, licking up every drop of pre-come, driving me wild. He used the tip to lap at the flared edge, especially the dimple that lies underneath. He flicked his tongue against that sensitive target until I grabbed the sheets in my fists and groaned.
“You like that?” he asked.
“Baby,” I said, breathing heavily, “I hope you put asbestos sheets on this bed because I’m going to burst into flames.”
Arc nuzzled my balls. “Open up wider. Put your legs back.”
“Oh, holy hell.” I spread open and let him have at me. His fingers stroked my shaft while he massaged my balls with his tongue. “That’s so fucking good,” I said.
He sucked one testicle behind his lips and patted it with his tongue before repeating the process with the other, alternating between the two until my balls felt swollen and heavy. I squeezed my eyes shut and concentrated on the wet sounds of Arc’s mouth. My hips rose off the mattress when he slid my cock between his lips and swallowed it to the hilt.
“You’re going to make me come,” I warned.
He spit out my cock and looked up at me. “Not yet.”
He licked my taint, then lower. Being rimmed is my personal favorite kink. I almost wept with joy when his tongue made tiny circles around my opening and then darted inside. I was muttering nonsense and rolling my head back and forth on the pillow. His fingers stroked the backs of my thighs while his tongue continued its soft fucking.
Everything he did—every touch, every wet lick—was a holy act, sacred and pure, done only to bring me pleasure. The sensations drove me to the brink, and my mouth uttered words I never had before.
“Arc,” I said, “make love to me.”
Sure, I’ve used words like “fuck me” or “pound me” or even “pile drive me into the dirt”, but I have never, ever, asked someone to make love to me. Until Arc.
He slid his silky body on top of mine and stared into my eyes.
“So,” he asked, “You’re ready for me?”
“I’m ready, baby,” I said. “Please.”
Since we’re gods, we don’t require lube or condoms. I wrapped my legs around him, crossing my ankles behind the small of his back so he couldn’t get away. As he buried his cock inside me, he unfurled his wings, covering us both in a feathery cocoon that made the world shrink until it was only the two of us. I stroked his face as I gazed into his eyes and felt myself open up even wider. Arc was in so deep, he was making love to my entire being, even my soul. That’s how full I felt. There wasn’t an empty space left anywhere.
We kissed softly while he languidly thrust. I matched his rhythm and we moved together in perfect synchronicity, giving and taking, gradually building speed until we were lost in delicious friction. Every cell in my body lit up and hummed.
“You feel so good,” I whispered. “You’re in me so deep, I almost can’t breathe.”
Every muscle clenched in bliss, and then released as I tumbled into orgasm. I cried out his name and kissed his face over and over.
“Arc, I love you,” I said. “I love you so fucking much.”
“You love me?” Arc asked.
“Yes,” I said. “Please don’t leave me.” I gripped him tighter with my arms and legs. “Stay. Just stay.”
“I could never leave,” Arc said. “You own my soul.” He came inside me, with a rush of breath mingled with a soft, sweet moan that made my toes curl it was so adorable. “Eros, I love you.”
He laid flat on top of me, his cock still pressed inside, warm breath against my ear. I played with his hair and tried to remember the last time I had been fucked so completely. Even Tobias hadn’t satisfied me like Arc had.
“You brought me back from the pits of hell,” I told Arc. “I didn’t think it was possible.”
“Love does that, Eros,” he said. “Feel what’s inside your heart right now. This is the joy you bring to the human race. Do you understand its significance—that those people need this just as much as you do? Maybe even more?”
“You’re right,” I said. “You made me see it. I understand.”
Arc said, “Promise me you will never lay down your bow again.”
“I’ll promise to never quit, if you promise to stay by my side. Please don’t let me fall back to where I was I can’t live through that pain twice.”
Arc smiled. “I solemnly promise that you are stuck with me forever.”
I nipped his chin. “Ever since last February, I’ve fantasized about this.”
“So did I, lover.”
“Why didn’t you make a move sooner?” I smacked his ass. “You asshole!”
“I was waiting for the right moment.” Arc pulled his cock from my ass, and a river of semen flowed out, which made me grin like an idiot because I love that gushy sensation. He smiled back. “I have to say,” he said, “it was well worth the wait. How do you feel?”
“Lighter,” I said. “You loved all the darkness out of me. I feel complete again. Thank you, lover.”
He poured us each a glass of mead. “To celebrate.”
“How did you manage to get this, anyway?” I asked, watching as Arc smirked at me over his glass. “You fucked the head fairy, didn’t you? Arc, you sly dog.”
“I have a whole case back at my place,” he said.
“I don’t doubt it for a minute. I’m surprised he didn’t give you an endless supply for all eternity ’cause you’re that good in the sack, baby.”
“Oh, he did, but only he lets me have a case at a time,” he said draining his glass. “Are you ready to resume our duties?”
“Yes, Archimedes, I am. Let’s go forth and spread some love.”
We showered, dressed, and raced each other back to the loft. I held Arc’s hand as we looked out over creation.
He leaned over and nibbled on my ear, before whispering into it. “Should we check in on Gavin and Hank one more time?”
“Yeah,” I said. “Let’s make sure they’re doing okay.”
Turns out, they were doing more than okay. In fact, they were pretty damn stellar. Hank was in the same position I had just been in—on his back, legs in the air—getting thoroughly fucked by Gavin’s juicy cock. Instead of angst, I felt euphoria. It even brought a tear to my eye.
“Look, Eros,” Arc said. “We made that happen, together. How do you feel about what we accomplished?”
“I feel fucktacular, baby,” I said. “Let’s get back down there and do it again.”
He gestured to the earth below. “Where to, beautiful?”
“Close your eyes and pick.” I kissed his shoulder while I slid my hand up his toga. “For the record, when we get back, it’s my turn. I’m going to tie you up and have my way with you.”
“What sort of dastardly plans do you have for me?” he asked, smiling.
“Good things. Things you’ll like.” I laughed as I grabbed his hand. “Pick a destination.” Arc closed his eyes and pointed.
My eyes followed his finger. “Utah? Oh, crap.”
And that, my friends is how I got my mojo back. Arc and I are partners in the love game, shooting people in the ass all over the world. So, the next time you find yourself falling hopelessly in love, look back and give me a wave.
I’m probably right behind you.
There’s more to wank over: